McSweeney’s Lists

Evidently, humor is most successfully delivered to the “young” voting demographic in list form. I have lost the article I might have once used to cite that piece of information, but see Jon Stewart, the Late Show, Demetri Martin, cracked.com, etc. for empirical (if minimal) evidence.
Really though, the best of them all, in this humble person’s opinion, come from McSweeney’s. Five recent favorites, listed below:
-JOKES I CAME UP WITH WHILE RECOVERING FROM METHICILLIN-RESISTANT STAPHYLOCOCCUS AUREUS.
-PLANNED SEQUELS TO NICOLAS CAGE’S UPCOMING FILM BANGKOK DANGEROUS.
-DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION
-TEXT MESSAGES THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN HELPFUL
-A PICNIC DATE ENDING IN AN AWKWARD SEXUAL ENCOUNTER, TOLD CHRONOLOGICALLY THROUGH BOARD-GAME TITLES.

-EC.

I Want This

Inhaling sulfur hexafluoride has the opposite effect as helium.

How Hiccups Evolved

A book from University of Chicago anatomy professor Neil Shubin proposes:

Spasms in our diaphragms, hiccups are triggered by electric signals generated in the brain stem. Amphibian brain stems emit similar signals, which control the regular motion of their gills. Our brain stems, inherited from amphibian ancestors, still spurt out odd signals producing hiccups that are, according to Shubin, essentially the same phenomenon as gill breathing.

The book is apparently a kooked-out case for evolution, with Shubin sharing out all the weird ways in which ancient, waterbased DNA still affects us today.

Fossil amphibian fins that demonstrate a structural affinity with human hands; teeth, first discovered in ancient jawless fish, that evolved into modern mammary and sweat glands; and genes, which control our eyes and ears, that correspond directly to DNA found in primitive jellyfish.

The title?  Your Inner Fish.

-BB

You Think You Know A Guy

Apologies to the readers who occasionally visit here in search of thought deposits.  You two have been very loyal.

It’s been a busy and mobile few weeks, but things will settle soon.

In the meantime, John Hodgman points out that something very different is afoot when “Richard Nixon’s personal Rasputin” is re-reading a Democratic Nominee’s speech with astonished admiration.

Use “the Google”

(As W. once called it.)

“There’s this e-mail that he didn’t shake hands with the troops,” Mr. Stickles said of a rumor that is false. “I don’t have the time to check out if it’s true, but if it is, it’s very offensive.”

- 57-year-old Ivan Stickles of Beaver County, PA, telling the New York Times why he won’t ‘take a gamble’ on Obama.

Verizon Goes Viral

How did they know?

-BB

Motorin’

via here.

Not Always Right

I just stumbled upon this apparently well-trafficked site (they sell t-shirts?) full of stories of service industry frustrations.  If you’ve ever worked in a restaurant, retail store, supermarket, amusement park, hardware store, etc, you can really lose time here.  One of my favorites.

-BB

The Good Old Days

We now have a President who believes in a place called Wish.  It’s like having to watch ‘Cats’ for five days. It’s like having Andrew Lloyd Webber for President.

-Fran Lebowitz, reacting to Bill Clinton’s inauguration, as quoted in a 1993 NYT story by Maureen Dowd and Frank Rich.

REVERSE, REVERSE

In a Tokyo convention hall.  Watching this and the word it conjures makes me hear that line from the Cha-Cha Slide, “Reverse, reverse!”

You’re welcome.

More escalator disaster: